Overthinking the silent dream killer!!!
Merry Christmas everyone!!!!
I hope everyone had an amazing Christmas!!! Mine was great, as usual, we drove down to Indiana to spend Christmas with family. I must say, I can't wait to start on a detox. I over ate. And I mean over ate. I ate everything I shouldn't have eaten. It was as if I was given a last meal request in jail and I ordered everything. Goodness, gracious! In my cousin's house, he had a scale in the bathroom like most homes. Its a digital scale so I decided to depress myself and jump on the scale. But you know what? God is soo good, every time I would jump on the scale it would say error. So I got off the scale and then it reset allowing me to jump on the scale. At that point, I said to myself there was a reason why the scale kept saying error because God did not want me to depress myself this holiday season. I left it alone and went about my business. I will just use my jeans as a measuring scale. If it is too tight then I know I need to lose some inches if its loose then praise God, another reason to go jean shopping to get a smaller size pair of jeans.
Anyways, so I am back home sitting here watching tv and I have been torturing myself thinking up crazy scenarios in my head and frightening myself so I decided to find a prayer on over thinking. I came across a blog and it said whatever you do, do not over think, because overthinking makes everything worse than it really is. Let me give you a background on why I decided to write this blog. As I told you that I have been going through something this year that I plan not to talk about until I know where things stand and then I can tell you what happened. Anyways, so I recently took a risk and a bold step in this situation and I am waiting for a result. I was talking to my girl about the risk I took and I told her that the result scares me. She was quick to say that if this thing was from God do you think you will be scared of the result. I think it is something you want more than God wants for you hence why you are scared. I said that is not at all. You can't say that just because I want something and I am scared of the risk I took it means that it is not from God. No way!!!! Even Moses was scared to lead the Israelites into Israel, does it mean it wasn't God's will for him. No, it just means that sometimes you have insecurities and fears. It means nothing. Everyone who takes a risk even if you are convinced that it is the right decision you are still worried or scared because at the end of the day we all question our decisions, we are all worried and scared it won't work out. It is human nature. It does not mean we do not have faith and trust in God of course not but it just means that you have fears. Anyways, so I took a risk and I'm waiting for the results and so far nothing yet. I do not know when I will get an answer or a result but then the waiting game is driving me crazy. So I am here thinking worst case scenario. I'm thinking I've done this in the past it didn't work, what makes me think it will work. A part of me is like let me just get the bad news now so I can move on and live my life. Another part of me is like ok maybe things are not so bad. It is just a battlefield in my mind and it's making me crazy.
I remember, that once I experienced something that I could not medically understand. OMG, in the middle of the night I woke my mum up freaking out. I didn't sleep a wink until the next day I saw my doctor and he was like seriously, it is nothing, it is very common. Go home and chill. That is just me. I am not saying I am a drama queen but I am a serious thinker. I think and think and think until I can't think anymore. Until I literally make myself sick. If I see something, I need to know what it means. If someone tells me something or compliments me, I may not react immediately but then later I will over think it, what did they mean, are they being honest with me, is this-this is this that? Only to find out that it is nothing at all. I know it's something my family and closest friends tell me. You over think things too much and it turns out to be nothing. I sometimes I overthink things till the thing becomes almost unappealing to me anymore and then when I see its nothing then I start to see that I threw away something that wasn't bad and made it seem so bad.
I am a work in progress, I have always been in my head. It is something I am working on. I am a person who believes that I have a strong faith and through that, a lot of people closest to me say they have seen a change in me. I am more positive, I always believe that even when something doesn't seem what it is I believe and trust it can turn around. I believe and trust that my faith is slowly changing the situation in my life. But there is that fear that what if I get disappointed and hurt? I know that if things don't' turn out the way I would pray they would, I would hurt but I will move on and be prepared for the next thing. But then there is this strong instinct and feeling that says everything is going to turn out alright. You know every day when I pray about my situation, there will be days I want to give up and walk away because I over thought the situation into a pulp, I will say a prayer and its so weird that God either through a preaching, or through someone, or something, I will get a response that says relax, chill, I got this, I hear your prayers and I can assure you your prayers will be answered. Just keep praying and keep having faith and I will turn it around just as you prayed. There are days that I will be sitting there praying and then as I am praying for the situation, I am reminded by the Holy Spirit that wait, you prayed for this and that and you prayed that this situation should come back to you at God's time so it's not time yet why you stressing. Chill. Stop getting fearful. The funny thing is, God always reminds us and He will keep reminding us even when we start to have fears and doubts. As much as He always says whatever you ask in faith, believe you will receive in faith and It shall be given to you. But then it's easy to look at your situation and how impossible it seems and you look at other people's situation and you are like that's not how theirs went how come mine isn't going down that way? Is this really the right thing for me? But then I am reminded, that our journeys' are different. Just because someone's situation may seem like it went a certain way, it doesn't mean yours should go the same way too. Sometimes you only see the end result of people's situations and not what they went through to get to that point.
The Sunday before Christmas, I had planned to go to church. I was like its the last Sunday before Christmas I must go and also I knew in Indiana we won't get to go to go to church on Christmas day so technically that would be my last service in 2016. We have two services, one is the morning service and then evening service. Anyway, I opted to go to evening service. The whole day I was laying about and just chilling and I had completely forgotten I was going to church. I got up at about 4:10 pm to go to the kitchen to start making dinner. As I was making dinner I looked at the time and I was like oh shoot I am going to church. At that point, I had a small battle that, I won't make its too late let me forget about going, but then I got an urge to go. So I turned off my dinner and I got ready and left for church. I got to church and in total, we were 8 people. 5 adults and 3 kids. My priest was so pleased I came because I hadn't been to evening service and also because nobody was there. Anyways, that day I was feeling really low because it was the day I had taken the risk and I was so worried and scared and feeling like I made a mistake. Service started and the priest started preaching. Can you believe everything the priest said was a direct message to me? I remember I had prayed earlier that God, I feel so low, I feel so down, did I do the right thing. I know I prayed about it but it feels like I made a mistake was I right? you would think my priest knew my situation. I was amazed. At that point I just said thank you Lord and my mood lifted immediately. Now let me tell you this, after service, there is a dinner that we have. So the priest had made a meal and we all sat down to eat. I went ahead and told her that your sermon was directed at me and I needed an answer to know if I made the right choice and your sermon just reassured me. Can you imagine she said, you know what, we almost cancelled evening service? Nobody was coming and we felt like we should cancel and then we got a prompting to keep service. So you see how God works?, He kept the service just for you. Now you should ask me? If God keeps telling you everything is ok, I am working it all out why do I fret and fuss? Because I am human! Because sometimes it easy to see the impossibility of your situation and say things will never change. You have people in your ear telling you to give up. Because I over think and also sometimes you believe you don't deserve what you have prayed for, or desire. Because your past experiences influence you to walk away. But if we always gave up because we did not see the results then we never achieve anything or receive what is meant for us. Sometimes we are so close to receiving what we prayed for but because we overthink, we give up and lose out on it, or we have to start the waiting game all over again.
I don't want to go on and on and on, but I just want to say My name is Adjoa Panyin Winful and I am an over thinker. I am constantly working every day to shut my mind off and let things go and let God. I am a control freak and like to be in control of everything and when I can't control it I freak out and start to doubt. I have taken risks in the past and they backfired sometimes so I constantly think that I won't get what I want and need because it hasn't happened in the past. I am a very positive and optimistic person but from time to time I lose my mind and start to go into the darkness of mind and scare myself straight. I am a human being and I know that I am a work in progress. I know that God will never bring me to shame and I know that God uses the impossibility of situations for His Glory to shine through. Whatever you lost, time, love, whatever, God restores ten fold. And you know what if things don't work out, it's not the end of the world. It just means one chapter has closed and a new chapter will open. And sometimes things go stale in our lives but then sometimes it is refreshed and renewed and made better .Overthinking, doesn't solve anything but it makes you worry more, stress more and freak out more.
One thing I know for sure is that my 2017 goal starting today, that I need to pray even more and let go of trying to over think. When I see my mind wandering, I need to reel it back in and say everything will be ok.
Anyways again guys Merry Christmas, life is not that serious and you know what, whatever you think, you start to believe and you put it out into the atmosphere and sometimes you poison your reality. If things don't work out the way you want them to then it's all good, life goes on. And sometimes things do work out the way you want it to and sometimes even better.
Sending you positive thoughts and love into 2017
lots of love
A.P.W
xoxo
I hope everyone had an amazing Christmas!!! Mine was great, as usual, we drove down to Indiana to spend Christmas with family. I must say, I can't wait to start on a detox. I over ate. And I mean over ate. I ate everything I shouldn't have eaten. It was as if I was given a last meal request in jail and I ordered everything. Goodness, gracious! In my cousin's house, he had a scale in the bathroom like most homes. Its a digital scale so I decided to depress myself and jump on the scale. But you know what? God is soo good, every time I would jump on the scale it would say error. So I got off the scale and then it reset allowing me to jump on the scale. At that point, I said to myself there was a reason why the scale kept saying error because God did not want me to depress myself this holiday season. I left it alone and went about my business. I will just use my jeans as a measuring scale. If it is too tight then I know I need to lose some inches if its loose then praise God, another reason to go jean shopping to get a smaller size pair of jeans.
Anyways, so I am back home sitting here watching tv and I have been torturing myself thinking up crazy scenarios in my head and frightening myself so I decided to find a prayer on over thinking. I came across a blog and it said whatever you do, do not over think, because overthinking makes everything worse than it really is. Let me give you a background on why I decided to write this blog. As I told you that I have been going through something this year that I plan not to talk about until I know where things stand and then I can tell you what happened. Anyways, so I recently took a risk and a bold step in this situation and I am waiting for a result. I was talking to my girl about the risk I took and I told her that the result scares me. She was quick to say that if this thing was from God do you think you will be scared of the result. I think it is something you want more than God wants for you hence why you are scared. I said that is not at all. You can't say that just because I want something and I am scared of the risk I took it means that it is not from God. No way!!!! Even Moses was scared to lead the Israelites into Israel, does it mean it wasn't God's will for him. No, it just means that sometimes you have insecurities and fears. It means nothing. Everyone who takes a risk even if you are convinced that it is the right decision you are still worried or scared because at the end of the day we all question our decisions, we are all worried and scared it won't work out. It is human nature. It does not mean we do not have faith and trust in God of course not but it just means that you have fears. Anyways, so I took a risk and I'm waiting for the results and so far nothing yet. I do not know when I will get an answer or a result but then the waiting game is driving me crazy. So I am here thinking worst case scenario. I'm thinking I've done this in the past it didn't work, what makes me think it will work. A part of me is like let me just get the bad news now so I can move on and live my life. Another part of me is like ok maybe things are not so bad. It is just a battlefield in my mind and it's making me crazy.
I remember, that once I experienced something that I could not medically understand. OMG, in the middle of the night I woke my mum up freaking out. I didn't sleep a wink until the next day I saw my doctor and he was like seriously, it is nothing, it is very common. Go home and chill. That is just me. I am not saying I am a drama queen but I am a serious thinker. I think and think and think until I can't think anymore. Until I literally make myself sick. If I see something, I need to know what it means. If someone tells me something or compliments me, I may not react immediately but then later I will over think it, what did they mean, are they being honest with me, is this-this is this that? Only to find out that it is nothing at all. I know it's something my family and closest friends tell me. You over think things too much and it turns out to be nothing. I sometimes I overthink things till the thing becomes almost unappealing to me anymore and then when I see its nothing then I start to see that I threw away something that wasn't bad and made it seem so bad.
I am a work in progress, I have always been in my head. It is something I am working on. I am a person who believes that I have a strong faith and through that, a lot of people closest to me say they have seen a change in me. I am more positive, I always believe that even when something doesn't seem what it is I believe and trust it can turn around. I believe and trust that my faith is slowly changing the situation in my life. But there is that fear that what if I get disappointed and hurt? I know that if things don't' turn out the way I would pray they would, I would hurt but I will move on and be prepared for the next thing. But then there is this strong instinct and feeling that says everything is going to turn out alright. You know every day when I pray about my situation, there will be days I want to give up and walk away because I over thought the situation into a pulp, I will say a prayer and its so weird that God either through a preaching, or through someone, or something, I will get a response that says relax, chill, I got this, I hear your prayers and I can assure you your prayers will be answered. Just keep praying and keep having faith and I will turn it around just as you prayed. There are days that I will be sitting there praying and then as I am praying for the situation, I am reminded by the Holy Spirit that wait, you prayed for this and that and you prayed that this situation should come back to you at God's time so it's not time yet why you stressing. Chill. Stop getting fearful. The funny thing is, God always reminds us and He will keep reminding us even when we start to have fears and doubts. As much as He always says whatever you ask in faith, believe you will receive in faith and It shall be given to you. But then it's easy to look at your situation and how impossible it seems and you look at other people's situation and you are like that's not how theirs went how come mine isn't going down that way? Is this really the right thing for me? But then I am reminded, that our journeys' are different. Just because someone's situation may seem like it went a certain way, it doesn't mean yours should go the same way too. Sometimes you only see the end result of people's situations and not what they went through to get to that point.
The Sunday before Christmas, I had planned to go to church. I was like its the last Sunday before Christmas I must go and also I knew in Indiana we won't get to go to go to church on Christmas day so technically that would be my last service in 2016. We have two services, one is the morning service and then evening service. Anyway, I opted to go to evening service. The whole day I was laying about and just chilling and I had completely forgotten I was going to church. I got up at about 4:10 pm to go to the kitchen to start making dinner. As I was making dinner I looked at the time and I was like oh shoot I am going to church. At that point, I had a small battle that, I won't make its too late let me forget about going, but then I got an urge to go. So I turned off my dinner and I got ready and left for church. I got to church and in total, we were 8 people. 5 adults and 3 kids. My priest was so pleased I came because I hadn't been to evening service and also because nobody was there. Anyways, that day I was feeling really low because it was the day I had taken the risk and I was so worried and scared and feeling like I made a mistake. Service started and the priest started preaching. Can you believe everything the priest said was a direct message to me? I remember I had prayed earlier that God, I feel so low, I feel so down, did I do the right thing. I know I prayed about it but it feels like I made a mistake was I right? you would think my priest knew my situation. I was amazed. At that point I just said thank you Lord and my mood lifted immediately. Now let me tell you this, after service, there is a dinner that we have. So the priest had made a meal and we all sat down to eat. I went ahead and told her that your sermon was directed at me and I needed an answer to know if I made the right choice and your sermon just reassured me. Can you imagine she said, you know what, we almost cancelled evening service? Nobody was coming and we felt like we should cancel and then we got a prompting to keep service. So you see how God works?, He kept the service just for you. Now you should ask me? If God keeps telling you everything is ok, I am working it all out why do I fret and fuss? Because I am human! Because sometimes it easy to see the impossibility of your situation and say things will never change. You have people in your ear telling you to give up. Because I over think and also sometimes you believe you don't deserve what you have prayed for, or desire. Because your past experiences influence you to walk away. But if we always gave up because we did not see the results then we never achieve anything or receive what is meant for us. Sometimes we are so close to receiving what we prayed for but because we overthink, we give up and lose out on it, or we have to start the waiting game all over again.
I don't want to go on and on and on, but I just want to say My name is Adjoa Panyin Winful and I am an over thinker. I am constantly working every day to shut my mind off and let things go and let God. I am a control freak and like to be in control of everything and when I can't control it I freak out and start to doubt. I have taken risks in the past and they backfired sometimes so I constantly think that I won't get what I want and need because it hasn't happened in the past. I am a very positive and optimistic person but from time to time I lose my mind and start to go into the darkness of mind and scare myself straight. I am a human being and I know that I am a work in progress. I know that God will never bring me to shame and I know that God uses the impossibility of situations for His Glory to shine through. Whatever you lost, time, love, whatever, God restores ten fold. And you know what if things don't work out, it's not the end of the world. It just means one chapter has closed and a new chapter will open. And sometimes things go stale in our lives but then sometimes it is refreshed and renewed and made better .Overthinking, doesn't solve anything but it makes you worry more, stress more and freak out more.
One thing I know for sure is that my 2017 goal starting today, that I need to pray even more and let go of trying to over think. When I see my mind wandering, I need to reel it back in and say everything will be ok.
Anyways again guys Merry Christmas, life is not that serious and you know what, whatever you think, you start to believe and you put it out into the atmosphere and sometimes you poison your reality. If things don't work out the way you want them to then it's all good, life goes on. And sometimes things do work out the way you want it to and sometimes even better.
Sending you positive thoughts and love into 2017
lots of love
A.P.W
xoxo
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