It's all about the Girl Tribe!

This blog is dedicated to all my female friends and family past and present. I just want to let you know how important you are to me and how my journey in life wouldn't have been worthwhile without you women.

Dear ladies,
I had the chance to watch Girls Trip this weekend and although it was a comedy, it definitely celebrated sisterhood and how important it is to have a girl tribe. It portrayed how each character/personality type had a role to play in the "flossy possy". It made me realize that it doesn't matter whether we are similar or different; we each  have a role that we play in each other's lives. And yes sometimes we may not see our worth in the other woman's life or we think this person only keeps us around to make them look better. I just want to say even if, and I mean if that is the case if you make someone look good then your job is done. The truth is, as women we need each other to make each other look good. As women, we need each other to look good, we need each other to uplift ourselves, we need each other to remind us that we matter and even when you are at your lowest, you need your girl tribe to give you a hand and raise you up or go down to where you are to sit with you and hold your hand to remind you that you can make it through.

We are often told that we are our own worst enemy. A woman will hurt another woman to save herself. We are often told we are like crabs in the bucket. We don't celebrate each other enough, we don't fight for one another, we are quick to stab each other in the back. We would cut out a female friend faster than a boyfriend even when the boyfriend is in the wrong. We will do whatever we can to make another woman feel less than just because we are intimidated by the other woman. Or working with women or having a female boss is the worst because instead of helping one another we will rather make sure we destroy the other person's career.  I've heard and even uttered some of these things myself. We are quick to size each other up and when a fellow sister is doing well in life we always are quick to say she slept her way to the top. We are quick to shame one another especially if a fellow sister is more sexually liberated than the other. We are quick to tell each other's secrets and we are quick to throw a fellow sister under the bus. I won't lie although it does happen and despite all these negative stereotypes, Womanhood or should I say sisterhood is being celebrated in our communities. We are supporting each other more and more each day. We are fighting for each other's rights and are quick to come to the defence of another sister.

Every woman in my life, from my mother all the way through to a woman I might have met today has played an important role in my life. I want to say that every woman I have crossed paths with past and present has a place in my heart. You have made me the person that I am today. Especially going through what I've been through and continually go through without having my sisters I wouldn't have been able to get through it. I am blessed beyond measure because God has blessed me with an amazing girl tribe. And my girl tribe may consist of a group of women who are close to me, from the ones who are miles away, to the ones just a few feet away. To the women,  I've known since childhood to the women I've met in my 30s. Even to the women who are not a part of my life anymore to the ones who just walked in. I celebrate each and every one of you because your presence made my life brighter.

One thing my mom told me and my sister growing up was this, "it doesn't matter what is going on in your life, whether you are single or married, whether you are a mother or not, whether you are a  corporate woman or a stay at home mom, never ever let go of your female friendships. Maintain them keep them. Yes, things might get in the way it is life but never ever let go of them. Meet up with them regularly, call them often because one thing is as much as your husband or your children may be your focus, you need to have a life outside of them and your girlfriends are exactly that."

As a single woman, I long for the day I will be married and get to spend time with my husband; I do not know how I would have coped being single without having my girlfriends. I believe my girlfriends have made my single life so much more bearable than I could have ever imagined. They have been supportive of me whenever a man came in and left. Whenever my career went down the toilet they supported me. Even the days when everything was going well I had my girl tribe. Whether it is calling me up on a Saturday night to say come lets go get ice cream, to those who will just send me a message to check in, to those who will help me fix up my resume whilst they are busy working or feeding their babies, to the countless advice and support and boosting of my confidence. Those who have confided in me with their problems and knew that I may have a supportive word, even those who got angry with me because I wasn't supportive enough or didn't do the right thing. To the ladies who know I love to eat and will be the ones to organize dinner dates, to the ones who will share the secrets of womanhood with me. To the ones who will come visit or I will go visit and we will sit up in bed and talk for hours or know I am off to go see a guy and they know he is full of it but have said I think you need to go see for yourself and stayed up to make sure I got back safely. I can say countless things why my girl tribe have made my life amazing but you know, and I know, that you know you that you mean the world to me. And even if you are not a part of my life anymore due to whatever reasons, just know you made my life beautiful and I hope I made yours beautiful at one point in time.

So I don't want to go on and on but I just want to say, women are amazing, they are powerful, they are beautiful, they are strong, we are skilful, we are smart. When we put our minds to something we can accomplish it. It doesn't matter whether we make mistakes we are human at the end of the day.  Despite it all, I just want to celebrate every woman in my life, past, present and future. I just want to say that I love you, I want to see you win every day and even if I haven't said it enough, or fought for you enough or been by your side through the darkest times in your life or even the good times, you still mean the world to me. I was blessed to have shared a womb with my first friend and I was born with my sister by my side but even if I wasn't, I've learned to appreciate the power of sisterhood.

So today it's all about you, and I pray the world celebrates you all whether as a group or as an individual. You are all in my heart every single day. Whether we speak or not you are in my soul and spirit.

Sending you love and light
lots of love
xoxo
A.P.W