Lonely but not Alone
I am lonely not alone. I am surrounded by framily (friends and family) people I can reach out to at any time. Even if I don't have people I have God and God has been all I need and desire. But the truth is even Adam who walked with God in the garden felt lonely.
God is always there but if you are a red-blooded human being you long for companionship. Although friends and family can offer you companionship sometimes there is a companionship you long for from that person you can call your own and have all to yourself.
These past few weeks have been tough, I've lost a close loved one and had to undergo yet another surgery. Yes, I have my family and friends around but there are days where I wish I had my special someone with me holding my hand and being there for me and me for them.
That day at the hospital I went in alone. My sister had to work so did my brother. I sat alone watching other patients who came in with their loved ones holding their hands through it to fight away the fear and nerves you feel when you are about to go under the knife. Unfortunately, all I had was Game of Thrones to keep me company... and even that was the final episode of the final season. If you watched it you know it was trash and not really worth watching especially before surgery. Although I wasn't worried or scared because I kept praying and God elevated the fear but having that human touch with me would have made it a little easier to endure.
I've met a few guys who started off to be interested in me and the next minute they are asking for nudes or calling me rigid because I won't give in to their sexual demands Some days I wonder if the man I desire is a mystical creature I am not desperate to settle. But some days I pray he shows up soon. But at the end of the day, God's timing is best but sometimes I wish He will work with my time table for once.
Keeping it real
Xoxo
A.P.W
Awesome read Adjoa... and I share these same sentiments too. Thank you for being a voice.
ReplyDeleteIndeed until this, I had never accepted the fact that I do get lonely but Yes! I do and unashamedly so because it’s life and this is as real as it gets.
I have always shied away from admitting that I am lonely for reasons of feeling vulnerable, having to act that I didn’t ‘need’ someone or thinking that I had to be self-reliant! But no, it’s perfectly fine to say that I need someone to share with (Hear my heart oh Lord).
I believe there’s a world of single people like us, who need to face up to the reality of loneliness (not as to seek for unnecessary attention but) to realize first of all that there’s no shame in expressing our need for someone to share with.
Frequently filling my time and space with (what I like best); worthwhile affirmations and Bible teachings either from seasoned coaches and or inspirational YouTubers does the trick. As the christian I am, I do surely believe in Gods perfect timing -for time and chance happens to ALL; and until He sends that special someone my way, I will continue with your cue to keep it real always. x
Girl Don't ever be ashamed of being lonely, some of the greatest people in history were lonely. Isaac was lonely when his mother died and his father went and found him his Rebecca. There is no shame in loneliness. Just don't let loneliness drive you to make decisions that you wouldn't have been made had you not felt that way. Discernment and wisdom is important. Our season is coming soon. Thank you for sharing your feelings and sentiments. I do this not only to share my thoughts and feelings but to encourage others. Life isn't picture perfect as instagram has made it seem , we all go through struggle and sometimes sharing is what makes it easier.
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